This column is something new that I figured that I would try for several reasons…

1. I'm really fucking lazy and didn't want to write anything new.
2. It's cool and I got an A on it.
3. It's all about one of my best friends, Mike Houck.
4. What the fuck is it?…you could ask…well, it's a paper that I wrote for my English 105 class first semester of my freshman year of college. Then, second semester, I revised it and wrote it as a soft newspaper story for my English 264 class…I received a better letter grade on the latter, so that is the one you are reading…or are about to. I hope you enjoy it…Mike is one hell of an interesting individual.

The coffee cup clinked as it hit the table, like an additional drum beat in the quiet Bob Dylan song that play in the background. A shrill squeal breaks the mood, and like a trained seal, Mike Houck jumps up from his chair to see if his services are need.

"Some say that fire fighting and humility go hand-in-hand. A certain humbleness comes from this job," he says. Fire fighting is what Mike is known for in his hometown of Sturgis, MI.

"I really don't know how I got involved with fire fighting," says Mike. "I kind of fell into it. It seems like right after a boy discovers his dick, he says, 'Wow, fire trucks.' It's the next thing that they're interested in. That's probably why I became a fireman. It's not very prolific, but it's the truth."

Houck, 44, lives with his wife, Crystal, and two sons in a normal home in an uncrowded neighborhood. He considers himself to be a run-of-the-mill type of guy.

Since 1977, he has been involved with the fire departments of Sturgis. Mike worked as a volunteer fireman for two years, and went on to become a fire fighter for the city of Sturgis. From there, he was promoted to Shift Captain, and in 1989 Mike was hired as Fire Marshal.

In August of this year, Mike demoted himself to Shift Captain.

"The hassles of working away from the fire station and working eight-to-five was just too much to keep doing," he says with certainty.

Now that Mike is back on shift he has more time to spend with his family. His family life is as normal and happy as anyone else's, with the exception of his son Jeremy's autism.

"We took Jeremy to Oaklawn Hospital, and the doctors diagnosed him as autistic," Mike explains. During that moment, our lives were crushed. I had studied autism briefly in college and Crystal didn't even know what autism was."

According to the Houcks, Jeremy is blessed. His autism isn't as severe as many cases are.

"Jeremy can talk, walk, is potty-trained, attends school at a local public school in a special ed. class and behaves like many little boys. We're very lucky. He is very shy, but with time, that fades," said Crystal of Jeremy.

Aside from being an excellent parent and fire fighter, Mike also has many hobbies. These are merely daily stress relievers. Reading books by Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. and John Irving, hosting bonfires and listening to various types of music all help him relax.

Mike's most time-consuming yet stress-relieving hobby is Tae Kwon Do. He is a fourth degree black belt, qualifying him as "Master." He has been involved with the martial art for about as long as fire fighting. Mike teaches classes at Sturgis' recreation center.

"I am lucky to be physically and mentally able to take such an active part in Tae Kwon Do. I look forward to keeping it a very high and active part of my life for years to come," said Mike.

The basement of the Houck household proves Mike's love for the martial arts true. It is scattered with boards, belts, certificates and workout equipment.

"I am happy to have found a sport that I can be so enthusiastic about. I love to learn and teach. I am lucky to be able to share Tae Kwon Do with students as they grow, both as children and adults. I hope that I can be a positive influence on their life and show them what

Tae Kwon Do has to offer in their lives," he says.

In addition to being a model friend, father, uncle, husband, painter, fireman and athlete, Mike also unknowingly flourishes at being a positive influence to many people.

"He's a great friend and has a good philosophy about friendship, especially toward those who are younger than he is. I spend a lot of time at his house and am proud to know him," said Corey Musolff, a 19-year-old friend of Mike's.

Many have asked, 'Why aren't more people between the ages of thirty and fifty more like Mike?' To most people that know him, Mike is the definition of 'cool.' Many teenagers would kill for a parent like him. He is caring, strong-minded, intelligent, yet carefree and one of the most responsible people you would ever run into.

He has survived through several cases of misfortune and yet upon entering his home, he's sitting happily at the table with a newspaper and a cup of coffee, ready to talk about anything that anyone could throw at him.

Mike explains his philosophy on friends this way.

"I see so many fucking idiots who just piss on people. You see them a year later, and they look lost and lonely. It's a big ass nasty world out there. If you burn every bridge that you've ever crossed, you're going to be lonely."

According to those who know him, Mike places no friendship higher than any other. His younger friends understand and respect this. "I guess that inside, I never grew up," he says.

Mike's adult friends may not understand why he can relate to kids, but that doesn't matter to him. "When I'm with other people my age and they start bitching about teenagers, I just look at them and think, 'You dumb fuck.' Nobody remembers doing drugs or fucking their best friend's girl. To them, acting like a kid is wrong now. I remember everything that I did, so when kids do it now, I'm not that hard on them."

Whether or not you agree with him, you must respect Mike Houck. He has what some would consider to be the perfect life.

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